There is nothing more to say about Simms G3 Guide Wading Jacket but I’ll see what I can do. First off this isn’t exactly a so-called “crushed review”* as I just received this jacket this year but I couldn’t wait to tell you how ridiculous this thing is.
The first thing that hits your eye is the orange camo. You might be saying, “This kid is right, that is ridiculous.” But after a day on the river feeling like you are Snake Eyes from G I Joe or a Navy Seal mercing fools, there’s no turning back. Even if you can’t sneak up on fish, you can pretty much sneak up on anything else on the river, especially your buddy to snag his last couple brews while he’s not looking. This one time my cousin was reeling in a fat brown and I swam up behind the fish unhooked it and hooked my own lip on it and my cousin didn’t know was me till I was in the net.
By no means am I the best fishermen on the river when I am out with my cousins. I spend most of my time big mountain freeskiing out west. So when I picked up this jacket I at least started to turn the tables on the river because the extreme jealousy of my cousins disrupted their Jedi fishing focus. If there’s one thing I learned skiing big mountains it’s that dropping the 60 footer does not mean a thing unless you can catch that stoke on video by wearing some dope gear. Same goes for fishing. When I’m dropping a 20 inch brookie on Instagram there’s no doubt that selfie isn’t just for a bunch of fat fishing dudes, but for all the females out there as well.
Check out cliff hucking action here (let it load..unless you have a geeked out alienware comp w/ government level bandwith)–>
The shoulder cut in this jacket makes you look like a beast. It’s been a while since my rugby days in college so I need all the help I can get to keep myself from looking like a pansy. Simms’ built in retractors are always the dank jams but you should already know that.
Zippers are a big deal. Whether it’s my ski jacket or my wading jacket my zippers better not be getting stuck. That goes for my pair of jean shorts too. The G3 will not disappoint.
As far as pockets go, Simms did not simply diarrhea pockets everywhere on this jacket. In my opinion there is just the right amount of pockets to keep you stealth so you can creep up on those fish like it’s Zero Dark Thirty. Top that all off with a hood and you got yourself one sick nasty jacket. If you haven’t realized this yet: in life don’t buy clothing without hoods or you’re probably going to look like a tool. I get hoods on my dress shirts.
The quality of this jacket is apparent right when you pull it out of the box. The new car smell punches you in the face and says, “Hey I’m going to be your best friend and make you jam and tea,” when the skies open up and Noah’s Ark 2 is coming at you. Or you got dragged out to some godforsaken river in the winter where even the fish have their own space heaters.
This jacket is just a shell so don’t be an idiot and forget to layer properly or I will come, find you and I will punch a pepperoni through your head. Maybe I will teach you all lessons on layering in a future post but now is not the time to impart all of my Dalai Lama wisdom.
You might be asking how it fairs when the sun comes out guns-a-blazin.’ Maybe some of you out there are like me… and those of you that know me should be saying…”Radcock, you are a human sauna and a liar… you only wear this when the fresh pow pow is falling on your head.” To those haters I say, “Nah bro, it’s called Gortex and it is bountiful in the G3.”
Finally and probably most importantly is what happens after you get off the River. I’m not going to lie I pretty much go straight into the club fresh out of the water in this bad boy. The short cut essential to a good wading jacket will help showcase your six pack and or beer bellies to the ladies. And don’t forget if you don’t have any game you can always take advantage of the elite stealth orange camo to creep on hunnies from any dark corner. Which, to that I say, Be bold mah man… no woman can turn down the gloriousness of this jacket. You will feel like a greek god… ala Brad Pitt in Troy when you wear this… and confidence is key whether you’re shredding the gnar in AK, slaying brookies on the Magalloway or pimpin’ at your local dive.
Here are the Radcock Ratings:
*Crushed Reviews are serious reviews for those who seriously beat gear. We don’t get paid by these companies and we don’t take free gear on a day or weekend trip and then review it. We pay for it then we crush our gear… hard, beat it, use it and sometimes even abuse it before we write a review. So you know this stuff is seriously tested.
We rate our crushed gear on a scale of 1-5. 1 = absolutely sucks, 2 = ehhh they could have done better and we are disappointed, 3 = average (average isn’t good enough for us), 4 = Good, we actually like it, 5 = Excellent
Look: 5 This is the sweetest jacket out there. Total Swag.
Waterproof: 5 Torential Downpour Proof
Durability: 4.5 Just because it can’t be all fives.
Pocket Space: 4.5 Not too much and not to little
Fit: 5 Greek God (see above)